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No one would even know if I left and never came back
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i am gettin the point, where i dont care anymore and i just want silence
Beefy
Billion Dollar Bitch- Joined
- Jun 18, 2019
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I get anxious over stupid shit like I am physically incapable of picking up my phone now without shaking and having a million reasons why I shouldn't text that person back and what could wrong if I spoke to them again. And it sucks because I know they don't give a shit but it still stresses me out. If I reply back will they ignore it and hate me forever? Or do they already feel that way about me?
It's been this way forever and I've sooo many opportunities because I just think of all the shit that could go wrong and nope tf out of it.
Like it's gotten to the point now where I overthink posting on threads......all of the worst outcomes just come to me and I leave. I hate it so much. This is why I have no friends. Because I just can't. Interacting with people stresses me out too much. I'll literally start shaking like a fucking chihuahua.
I'm so scared of someone hating me or if I end embarrassing myself.
I wish my mom would've gotten me counseling after seeing me have a full-blown freak out over a church meeting but alas she hates me.
It's been this way forever and I've sooo many opportunities because I just think of all the shit that could go wrong and nope tf out of it.
Like it's gotten to the point now where I overthink posting on threads......all of the worst outcomes just come to me and I leave. I hate it so much. This is why I have no friends. Because I just can't. Interacting with people stresses me out too much. I'll literally start shaking like a fucking chihuahua.
I'm so scared of someone hating me or if I end embarrassing myself.
I wish my mom would've gotten me counseling after seeing me have a full-blown freak out over a church meeting but alas she hates me.
Nieve
NuguBeen in such a weird place lately and somehow it feels worse each day
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crazy how my mood goes from 100 to 0 over tiny things and it doesnt pick up till days later
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I was gonna end it last Sunday. I don't feel any happier now but it's not something I'm lingering on. It'll happen one day.
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I've tried reading positive things but it all read as fake to me. I'm not important. I'm not special. You don't really love me. I'm not stupid, I can see how you all really feel.
Beefy
Billion Dollar Bitch- Joined
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The amount of pure rage I feel right now is insane.nLike tiny shit just triggers these intense emotions for no reason, I've been feeling pretty numb for a while now which is great. But now I feel like screaming at someone or smashing a hole into my wall. This is why I hate doing shit because something negative will always come out of it no matter what. Even tho it happened a while again I'm still boiling. Now my mom keeps egging it on by getting upset with me over irrelevant shit. Like fuck all of this shit and fuck the people involved with it. I'm just gonna type out some sort of rant and pray it subsides soon.
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I'm back keeping this thread alive but I'm not in a depressive state rn which is why I'm back. I'm feeling much better and my life feels much more in control right now. Hopefully things can stay this way.
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.
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- Joined
- Jun 26, 2019
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.
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B
bumbers
GuestI can't wait for summer to end, and it hasn't even started. The heat tends to worsen my pain which ends up affecting my mental health but I'm "Staying Alive" still!
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I hope one day I can find peace in my heart. Those hurtful things....even though I heard them, you said them.
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My grandma pass away and i'm feeling so broken, she was the only family member i talked to and i really loved her, i'm so sad i can't say good bye to her, my mind is not in a good place right now
- Joined
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I have so much self-doubts about myself. Even if peoples tell me that they care about me, there are times that I doubt it. As a result, I ended up pushing away peoples whom care about me. A lot of times, I think peoples hate me.
In front of family and friends I smile and joke but my depression and anxiety are getting worse as the days go by. I am taking steps to try to fix it. But it is really hard. I want to give up. So many time.
I wish that I can cry away all my pains and sorrows but the tears refuse to come, thus continuing to bury me in the darkness.
I really hate myself.
In front of family and friends I smile and joke but my depression and anxiety are getting worse as the days go by. I am taking steps to try to fix it. But it is really hard. I want to give up. So many time.
I wish that I can cry away all my pains and sorrows but the tears refuse to come, thus continuing to bury me in the darkness.
I really hate myself.
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2019
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- She/Her
I'm just always constantly looking for approval, for praise. I wish I didn't but it's like an addiction to me. I need to change my state of mind.
- Joined
- Jun 19, 2019
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gonna start my internship on monday and I'm already anxious what if I make mistakes and dont get along with the others what if they regret accepting me my heart already beats fast just thinking about it
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2019
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Imagine people joking and telling you to kill yourself. Just imagine what that could do to someone.
Beefy
Billion Dollar Bitch- Joined
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- They/Them
I don’t truly have a clear version of myself. It’s hard to describe but I don’t know who I truly am or what my personality is supposed to be like. It’s like I’m just running on some weird autopilot. For the past couple of years it’s felt like I don’t know who I am anymore and even when I look back at stuff from even a couple of months ago it just feels so detached. Whenever I chat with people I have to stop and ask myself “Is this something I would say? Is this how I was?”
I can’t do a lot of things either because of my anxiety. I overthink everything and I just don’t do it. I always assume everyone hates me when I know they’re indifferent but I still can’t. And whenever I bring it up to people it feels like I’m manipulating them and gaining pity points. I hate it. Absolute hate it. I wish I could just live my life without the fear of rejection, the constant paranoia or the need for acknowledgment.
I can’t do a lot of things either because of my anxiety. I overthink everything and I just don’t do it. I always assume everyone hates me when I know they’re indifferent but I still can’t. And whenever I bring it up to people it feels like I’m manipulating them and gaining pity points. I hate it. Absolute hate it. I wish I could just live my life without the fear of rejection, the constant paranoia or the need for acknowledgment.
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- Joined
- Jun 2, 2019
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- 2,256
- Reaction score
- 3,699
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- 38,820
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- She/Her
I read that people with anxiety tend to watch things they've seen already over and over because they already know what's going to happen. I think that's true for me! But there's this other feeling I can't shake off cause I watch the same MVs over and over too....
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